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367. Time to Lighten Up Again

Too much bad news. It’s time to lighten  things up again.
IT’S WORTH CONSIDERING
I have been sitting on the following story for some time. Considering all the bad news I’ve posted lately, it’s time for a change of pace. Oddly enough, the story is quite sad, adding to the bad news, but I feel now is the time to print it anyway. I’m indebted to the original author (unknown) for the insights and for bring this to our attention.

A Life Remembered
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from being repeatedly poked in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Born and bread in Minnesota, Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he lived to be a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and share that smile with someone else that may be having a crumby day and kneads a lift.

Another Icon Dead at 93
There’s been another death that is equally sad. Larry LaPrise, the man responsible for the Hokey Pokey, recently died peacefully at age 93. The family was doing well considering their loss until it was time to place the body into the coffin. As soon as they tried to put his left leg in, the trouble started.

The Taliban and the Jewish Man
A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand selling ties.
The Taliban asked, “do you have water?”
The Jewish man replied, “I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5.”
The Taliban shouted, “Idiot! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!”
“Ok”, said the old Jewish man, “it does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that. If you continue over the hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. It has all the ice water you need. Shalom.”
Cursing, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, almost dead and said, “Your idiot of a brother won’t let me in without a tie!”

ON THE EVEN LIGHTER SIDE

Thanks to THE FAR SIDE:


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